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Chick Ludwig covers the Cincinnati Bengals. He also writes about his other passions: college football, basketball and golf.Home > Blogs > Chick Ludwig At Large > Archives > 2009 > January > 11 > Entry
Mine eyes have seen glory, but my ears hurt
BEST DIVISION IN THE NFL?
AFC NORTH — FAR & AWAY
===If the “Chickster” were a Roman Catholic priest hearing confession, I would whisper: “For your penance, you must listen to NFL analyst Dennis Green for an entire 3-hour, 30-minute game on the radio.”===
Without question, the best division in the National Football League … the very best … is the AFC North.
It has produced two of the league’s “Final Four” in the race and chase to Super Bowl XLIII — the pugilistic Pittsburgh Steelers and the belligerent Baltimore Ravens.
They’ll battle for the American Football Conference championship on Sunday, Jan. 18, 2008, for the privilege and honor of representing the AFC in the Super Bowl at Raymond James Stadium in Tampa, Fla., on Feb. 1.
Baltimore took down the Tennessee Titans, 13-10, on Saturday, while the Steelers chopped down the San Diego Chargers, 35-24, on Sunday in the divisional playoffs.
The two best teams in the best division in football battling for the AFC title. Pretty cool, eh? Eat your hearts out, Titans & Colts, Dolphins & Patriots.
Representing the NFC in the Super Bowl will be the winner between No. 4 seed Arizona (NFC West) and No. 6 seed Philadelphia (NFC East), to be settled on Sunday, Jan. 18, at University of Phoenix Stadium in Glendale, Ariz.
Naturally, I’m rooting for the underdogs — the Cardinals and Ravens. My fear is an All-Pennsylvania Super Bowl.
I’d like to offer a tissue to teary-eyed Eli Manning … and Campbell’s Chunky Soup King LaDainian Tomlinson will be waiting a l-o-n-g time for my Pro Football Hall of Fame vote, which may never come.
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SOMEBODY PLEASE STUFF A SOCK
IN PIE HOLES OF JOHNSON, GREEN
FOX NFL Sunday needs to get out the hook and dump Jimmy Johnson, while Westwood One — America’s largest radio network — needs to throw Dennis Green overboard without a life jacket.
Dennis Green
Jimmy Johnson
Both ex-coaches are ridiculously overmatched on the studio set and in the radio booth to the point where they’re hurting their networks’ credibility.
Following Philadelphia’s 23-11 victory over the New York Giants at the Meadowlands — a triumph that “Ludwig At Large” predicted — Johnson said that Giants coach Tom Coughlin made a big mistake by not deferring to open the game in order to make better use of the wind factor.
Well, folks, guess what?
The Philadelphia Eagles won the toss and head coach Andy Reid elected to defer — smart move.
Jimmy Johnson, a dude with glass-gray hair, either wasn’t paying attention to the coin toss or has no idea how the rules work.
I hear that Johnson lives in Islamorada in the Florida Keys where he spends a lot of his time fishing. As Dallas Cowboys running back Duane Thomas once uttered … “Evidently.”
Only cat on the planet worse than Jimmy, when it comes to blathering, is Barry Switzer.
And then there’s Dennis Green.
If I were a Roman Catholic priest hearing a confession, I would whisper: “For your penance, you must listen to NFL analyst Dennis Green for an entire 3-hour, 30-minute game on the radio.”
Listening to Green’s squeaky, high-pitched voice — which happens to be perpetually hoarse — for that length of time is enough to cause me to climb into a bathtub with a razor blade aimed at my wrist.
I feel sorry for play-by-play man Ian Eagle, who has to put up with Green.
I’d rather listen to the sound of Howard Hughes’ fingernails scraping across a blackboard that be forced to hear Green speak. I keep asking myself, “Why couldn’t Green coach what he preaches?”
I’m left to believe that the fastest way to Radio/TV stardom is to retire or get fired as a player or coach.
UNTIL NEXT TIME…
This is “The Chickster” saying, “Make Love, Not War; Give Peace a Chance; and Strawberry Fields Forever.”
Contact Chick Ludwig at cludwig@daytondailynews.com
For more about Chick Ludwig, go to:
http://www.linkedin.com/in/chickludwig56
Permalink | Comments (8) | Post your comment | Categories: Radio/TV
Comments
By Janeen Coyle
January 11, 2009 9:27 PM | Link to this
Chickster, Not everyone can have your set of pipes!!! You should be on the radio brother…Oh wait you are on the radio, Okay you should have your own show!!!! Was Dennis Green a coach? I can’t keep up?By Brian
January 11, 2009 9:38 PM | Link to this
Would one of the networks get on the ball and lure Mike Brown into the broadcast booth so he can be paired with Matt Millen?By Chick Ludwig
January 11, 2009 10:13 PM | Link to this
Hi Janeen: How’s Chris’ favorite bodyguard? If you weren’t on the radio, you would be either a centerfold or world karate champion! Yes, Denny Green was a coach. A good one for a long time with the Minnesota Vikings. But he ran out of gas. Never won more than 6 games his final 4 years as a head coach (final season in Minn & 3 years with the ‘Zona Cardinals)…one more thing: WGRR rules!By photoman
January 11, 2009 10:16 PM | Link to this
If you can’t say something nice about somebody, fake it. That group is pretty bad. Fortunately I don’t have to see them very often. JJ and TB etc.; I’m glad they are all together so I don’t have to see any of them elsewhere. I don’t know DG, but your probably right there too. I’m glad we only have you to “kick around”, to use the words of RMN.(PS. I’d rather have to say three “Our Father’s” and three “Hail Mary’s” and make a good act of contrition).By photoman
January 11, 2009 10:23 PM | Link to this
I remember DG now, since you’ve added the above post, but I don’t think I have ever heard him speak. I guess he won’t make it to TV land with that voice.By michael
January 12, 2009 1:08 AM | Link to this
“You play to win the game!” and “they were who we thought they were!” haha classicBy Mr.DadSir
January 12, 2009 7:51 AM | Link to this
Speaking of former coaches.It is common knowledge that coach Cower is a coaching genius,but why would another team want to hire a guy that so openly cheers for his former team?I absolutely agree with you about J Johnson and D Green.By Derrick
January 12, 2009 2:37 PM | Link to this
The FoxSports Network has, by far, the worst broadcasters in the business! Also, I can’t watch the pre-game and post-game studio blabber fests. They are absolutely pitiful! Frankly, I am not so sure Cower is a genius coach. Pittsburgh had stellar seasons with Noll and now Tomlin. They just keep marching on because the have a good front office, scouting department, and their primary goal is to win, not ensure the owners’ grandchildren never have to work for a living.