100 worst movies of the decade

By Zack McGhee | Thursday, October 1, 2009, 04:35 PM

Rotten Tomatoes recently published its list of the Worst of the Worst, the lowest-rated films on the Tomatometer from 2000 through 2009. Of course, there is a slight problem with the fresh/rotten methodology — namely that if everyone thinks a movie is merely mediocre and not worth seeing, it could end up at the bottom (top?) of the list.

But no matter. What I was most curious about is how many films in this “veritable cornucopia of dull, foolhardy, and outright terrible films” I had seen. The answer? 13. And guess what? There’s even one that I still want to see, but haven’t. Have a look at my list — and share your own — after the jump.

90. Dragonfly This Kevin Costner-anchored disaster is a psychological drama directed by “comedy” veteran Tom Shadyac (The Nutty Professor, Patch Adams) in an attempt to break out of the box. Given how it turned out, he quickly climbed back in to direct another pair of Almighty monstrosities (Bruce and Evan, respectively).

80. Big Momma’s House 2 Confession: Although it’s very paint-by-numbers, I didn’t hate this movie. And in fact, I consider it a major improvement over its vulgar, incoherent predecessor.

77. Date Movie I saw this as the B-side to a double-feature after Scary Movie 4 at the Dixie drive-in in 2006. We stuck around because of the promise of the hilarious, charming Alyson Hannigan. Mistake.

74. Envy This little-seen 2004 Barry Levinson comedy stars Ben Stiller and Jack Black. Dark and strange, but still worth seeing as far as I’m concerned, if for no other reason than co-star Christopher Walken.

73. Gigli I saw this one on DVD after all the hoopla. It’s a messy but interesting film — still a misfire, but hardly the massive failure it was touted as in the wake of the Bennifer split.

64. Corky Romano I saw this Chris Kattan comedy at a friend’s house on DVD. I confess: I laughed more than I expected to, but I can’t remember a thing about it.

61. Good Luck Chuck Painfully generic romantic comedy is one of many strained attempts in recent years to posit Dane Cook as a leading man. There are some funny moments, but they’re all undercut by one of the most reprehensibly grotesque scenes I’ve ever seen in the movies.

40. Down To You Forgettable romance stars Freddie Prinze Jr. and Julia Stiles, and uses unconventional flashback structure to little effect.

39. Miss March Released just this year, Miss March is an amateurish comedy with a handful of hearty laughs and a lot of wasted effort, but it’s hardly among the decade’s worst. (Plus: Newcomer Zach Cregger is super cute.)

34. The Haunting of Molly Hartley Entertaining, somewhat suspenseful thriller takes an audacious turn in its final reel. More puzzling than abhorrent, it’s bad in a good way.

31. The Covenant Ah, yes! Now we’re getting down to the good stuff. The Covenant, or Boycraft as my crew affectionately calls it, has hot guys with post-pubescent supernatural gifts, winding family histories, school uniforms, and ancient scores to settle. It doesn’t quite earn true guilty pleasure status (not enough camp), but if these were the days of VHS, I’d have worn out those swim team practice scenes by now.

27. Battlefield Earth: A Saga of the Year 3000 I honestly have no idea why I went to see this movie. Maybe I just wanted to see if it was really as bad as everyone said it would be. It was.

2. One Missed Call This 2008 thriller is yet another weak Japanese horror remake. For my money, The Ring 2 is the worst offender, but if One Missed Call isn’t that atrocious, it’s just as incomprehensible.

P.S. The one movie on the list that I still want to see (but haven’t gotten around to) is Uwe Boll’s notorious Alone in the Dark (#15), starring Christian Slater and Tara Reid. Film critic Matt Signer writes: “I urge you to see it. It will change your life. It will change the way you see the world. And phones.” Here’s why.

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