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By D.L. Stewart, Contributing Writer 5:52 PM Tuesday, November 17, 2009

According to reliable sources, the end of the world is coming on May 27, 2012. Or, on a much more optimistic note, Dec. 12, 2012.

The earlier prediction is from Ronald Weinland, a northern Kentucky minister who, according to his own modest confession, was made a prophet by God in 1997. Prior to becoming a prophet, God had made him a salesman in the petrochemical industry.

The Dec. 12 forecast is based upon the calendar used by the ancient Mayans, who were not actually ancient at the time they used it.

Whichever date is correct, people are taking the year 2012 very seriously, as evidenced by the fact that they filled theaters last weekend to see a movie of the same name.

Of course, end of the world forecasts have been made by learned scholars since shortly after the beginning of the world. Among them:

• In 1986, Alfred Schmielewsky, a self-styled “super psychic,” predicted that the world’s greatest natural disaster would hit Montreal in 1988. Not only did he miss on that one, he failed to make a prediction for April 11, 1999, when his world ended. That was the day the “super psychic” answered the door of his home and was shot to death.

• Super Dave the Wonderchemist added the “magic number” 1331 to the “Year of the Beast” number 666 and concluded that the world would end in 1997.

• In 1998, 50 followers of a religious sect moved to Garland, Texas, where they believed God would broadcast a commercial on Channel 18. The commercial never aired, possibly pre-empted by a Dallas Cowboys’ game.

• A church in Taiwan predicted that a nuclear war would break out in July, 1999, and the only way its congregation could be saved was to board a spaceship that would take off from a beach in Miller, Ind.

• Also in 1999, Time magazine quoted a source that an alignment of the planets would burn up the Earth in May. The source was identified as Bryan Elder, an Arkansas hydraulics specialist.

As nearly as I can tell from my research, the world did not end in any of those years. But employment in the end of the world prophecy industry continues to flourish.

According to the Complete Idiot’s Guide to 2012, (www.122112.com), there are nearly 600,000 Web sites devoted to it. When I Googled “end of the world 2012,” it turned up 51.9 million hits. Significantly, “End of the world 2013,” resulted in only 1.3 million.

Also on the Complete Idiot’s Guide, you’ll find many items to help you prepare for the end of the world, including “Let’s Get Ready to Rapture” T-shirts, thong underwear and keepsake boxes; although putting keepsakes into a box when the world is about to end does seem a little pointless.

Still, I understand the gravity of these predictions and I am taking them very seriously. Because, if the world is going to end in 2012, that gives the Cleveland Browns just three more chances to make it to the Super Bowl.

>Contact D.L. Stewart at dlstew_2000@yahoo.com.

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