Tiny package delivers hope for mom-to-be

Contributed photo Heidi, Baby Daryn and The Shoes.

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By Daryn Kagan, Contributing Writer Updated 5:51 PM Thursday, October 7, 2010

Sometimes our biggest job as a friend is simply to believe, to dare, to take the leap of faith when the person we love so much has run out of every ounce of hope.

There are few people on earth who wanted to be a mom more than my college roommate and dearest friend, Heidi. And yet few people had a harder time making a baby.

Thermometers, Clomid, ultrasounds, in vitro ... You name it, Heidi and her husband, Steve, tried it, all in that longing to have a baby.

Since Heidi and I are so close, I went along for that roller coaster ride, hoping each new thing would be THE thing that made the baby.

But after about four years, Heidi had enough. She broke up with all the needles and science experiments and Petri dishes.

At age 41, she walked away. That might not make sense to some folks — not much about this story does — but Heidi had to listen to her gut.

Instead of all the science and hormone injections, she went on a radical diet that included no processed foods, additives or preservatives.

She added acupuncture. And perhaps, hardest of all, she worked really hard to find peace and satisfaction. She tried to focus on the blessings already in her life instead of what wasn’t there.

What do you know? For the first time, Heidi got pregnant!

I’d like to tell you that was the happy ending of this story. But, like I said, not much about this story makes sense.

Somewhere in that first trimester, Heidi had a miscarriage. “It was nature’s way ... it was for the best, blah blah blah.”

Save those words. They were of little comfort to a woman who lost the baby she longed for. Heidi was devastated.

It turns out, this all coincided with a trip I was taking to the Bay Area. If nothing else, I could be there for my dear friend. And I knew what I had to give her.

After I arrived at Heidi’s and gave her a hug, I took a deep breath and handed her the package I was so sure she was meant to have.

Heidi opened the package, and inside she found the tiniest pair of Nike sneakers.

I was afraid to breathe. After all, who gives a pair of baby shoes to a woman who can’t make a baby? Does it get more insensitive than that? So, I explained:

“I’m really going with my gut on this one. I know right now at this moment, you are devastated and spent. You’ve given your all trying to make your dream come true. And you have nothing left, even to believe that it might. Well, I do. I’m giving you these shoes because I know that you will be a mother. I know your child is on his or her way to you. I can’t tell you exactly where the baby is coming from, but the child is on the way, and when she gets here, she’s going to need some shoes!”

She grabbed the shoes close to her chest and sobbed.

This is the part of the story when I get to pass out the smiles.

About 10 months later, Heidi and Steve had a healthy baby girl! Indeed, that is the back story on my namesake, Baby Daryn.

In the joy of welcoming the child, I actually forgot about the shoes. Until about five months later when Heidi brought Daryn to Atlanta for her first visit.

“I have a present for you,” Heidi said, as she handed me a wrapped gift. Inside was a photo of Heidi holding Baby Daryn wearing — you guessed it — The Shoes.

Underneath the photo, Heidi had penciled in a single word. It said, “Believe.”

Daryn Kagan is the creator and host of DarynKagan.com, an online community that features a daily Web cast of inspirational stories that show what is possible. The former CNN anchor and news reporter is the author of “What’s Possible! 50 True Stories of People Who Dared To Dream They Could Make a Difference.”

Share your stories of hope with Daryn

Daryn wants to hear how you or someone you know is showing the world What’s Possible. Send your inspirational news and stories to Life@DaytonDailyNews.com. Please include your name, hometown and a phone number where you can be reached. Please include WHAT’S POSSIBLE in the subject line.

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A sneak peek at Daryn’s next column

“Most people will lose that thing they think defines them. It might be a job or a marriage. Maybe you’re a stay-at-home mom and your kids grow up and move away. Whatever it is, I can pretty much guarantee that thing that you call yourself will go away. The question then becomes, ‘What now?’ ”

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