Every year at about this time, Julieanne Phillips of Troy asks her mother the same question.

“What would you like me to get you for Mother’s Day?”

The response from her mom, Patricia Zajacr, is always the same.

“Your time.”

“My mother says that money and possessions come and go, but time with her daughter creates memories for a lifetime,” says Phillips. So every May the two go on a vacation together.

“Our every day life is so hectic and even though we keep in daily contact with phone calls, e-mails and texting, there’s nothing like one-on-one time with your mom to reconnect with each other away from life’s daily commitments and time schedule,” Phillips says. The two have been to Memphis, Nashville, New York City and Las Vegas.

“It isn’t so much the destination that’s the highlight of our trips, it’s the alone time we have with each other,” she adds. “Someday when my daughters ask what I want for Mother’s Day, I already have my answer!”

Betty Mitchell of Springboro says she and her brother have already given their mom the best Mother’s Day gift ever.

“We gave her six grandchildren, and now three great-grandchildren with number four on the way,” Mitchell says. “She says her greatest joy in life is her family and her greatest, happiest days are when she’s with us. It doesn’t have to be fancy, just a little talk or a meal together is all it takes.”

Clarice Price, Betty’s mother, has spent a lifetime modeling the giving and loving she’s now getting back.

“She was married at 16 and had two babies by 19,” says her daughter. “Even at such a young age she took mothering seriously — my brother and I were both born with a genetic skin disorder, Epidermolysis Bullosa, that’s very difficult to manage especially in infancy and early childhood. She did skin treatments twice a day for both of us for many years. She gave us love, fun, her faith in God, good meals, and most of all, herself.”

Dayton Children’s child psychologist Julie Stucke says the modeling these moms have done is extremely important.

“Children don’t automatically know how to be appreciative and giving,” she explains. “It’s learned, not innate behavior. It’s really important for mothers and fathers to teach their children to be thankful.”

“When flowers start popping up in the spring, perhaps Dad can suggest that the children pick some for Mom,” says Stucke. “Or when they’re at the store and see Mom’s favorite chocolate, he can suggest getting it for her. When birthdays roll around, remind children that it’s time to make something for their siblings.”

Teenagers may need a little more prodding, she says, because they’re past the age when they’re making Mother’s Day crafts at school.

“Teens can be extremely self-centered, and may think these kinds of things aren’t important,” says Stucke. “But they also need to be reminded that small gifts and a hug are important. If they’re earning money and spending most of it on themselves, they should also be using some of it to buy gifts for important occasions.”

Dottie McClellan of Fairborn says the best gift she’s given her mom is “me!”

“My mom protected her flock,” says Phillips. “As an adult, I took all that teaching and love and protection I learned and became a nurse. Now that Mom is almost 87, I can give her the best of me: mow the yard, do house repairs and errands, and use my nursing skills to help her by going with her to the doctor, evaluating her medicines.”

Appreciation doesn’t need to come in the form of a fancy gift.

“Thinking about your mom’s interests or hobbies is a another good way to show you really care, suggests Stucke. “If she likes to scrapbook, get her some scrap booking supplies, if she’s a gardener, get her tools or plants for her garden.”

The psychologist believes it’s the little daily things that can make a difference.

“If Mother makes dinner, Dad can thank her for making it in front of the children, then prompt them to do the same.

“Model appreciation for your kids — not just on Mother’s and Father’s Day, but all year long.”

Contact this reporter at (937) 225-2440 or mmoss@DaytonDailyNews.com.