You have to feel sorry for Ryan Gosling.
OK, you don’t HAVE to. After all, he’s 37 years old and worth a reported $30 million. He can sing, dance and act. He dated beautiful women before he married a different beautiful woman. He’s not particularly homely. Even though he was born in Canada, he probably is not facing immediate deportation.
So maybe I’m the only person in the world who could work up even a tiny bit of sorry for him after the Academy Awards concluded its telecast Monday morning by shoving a cream pie in its own face.
In case you couldn’t stay awake through the entire four hours of Hollywood stars in expensive clothes patting themselves on their backs – which was preceded by approximately 6 billion hours of Hollywood stars talking about themselves and their expensive clothes on the red carpet – here’s what you missed:
La La Land, the movie in which Gosling co-starred, racked up half a dozen Oscars. Best production design. Best cinematography. Best music score. Best song. Best actress. Best director.
One award it didn’t win, though, was best actor, a category in which Gosling was nominated. On a team full of first-place finishers, Gosling was no better than a runner-up. The guy who struck out after every player hit a home run. The weak link in the chain. Even with $30 million and a beautiful wife, that had to be deflating. Maybe even embarrassing.
But there was one possible consolation prize for him – best movie. La La Land was favored and at least Gosling could say he played on the winning team and had earned a share of the Oscar.
So when Faye Dunaway and Warren Beatty — who appeared as if they had stayed up way past their bedtimes — opened the envelope and announced La La Land as the winner, it had to feel like a consolation prize for Gosling as he took the stage with the other members of the cast. At least he wouldn’t be going home to his beautiful wife and their $30 million empty-handed
But it was, as you may have heard, an exceedingly brief consolation. They had opened the wrong envelope. Moonlight was the actual winner. There was no Oscar for La La Land. No consolation for Ryan Gosling.
So, yeah, a feel a little bit sorry for him and I can sort of identify how he must feel today, even though he and I have nothing in common.
Except, for course, for the beautiful wife part.
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