D.L. Stewart web exclusive: Irish woman goes off the Depp end

Among my favorite movies are the “Pirates of the Caribbean” flicks. At least the first 10 or 11 of them. As Captain Jack Sparrow, Johnny Depp is a lot of fun as he rolls his eyes and minces across the poop deck as a swishy swashbuckler.

As much as I enjoy watching his performances, though, I don’t want to look like him. I’m not even sure I could afford his eyeliner.

But a woman in North Ireland “just really related to him.”

So, as first reported in the Mirror, which is a British tabloid, Amanda Large, a single mother of four with a part-time sales job, spent the British equivalent of $6,000 to transform herself into a Johnny Depp look-alike. The makeover included getting golden caps on her teeth, “painful” tattoos on her arms and officially changing her name to Amanda Sparrow. Her attempt at total authenticity fell short when she discovered she couldn’t grow a respectable mustache and chin whiskers; but then, Johnny Depps’ weren’t all that great, either.

While $6,000 might seem like a lot of money to make herself look like a Caribbean pirate, you have to keep in mind that she’ll be saving a lot of money on Halloween costumes.

And whether it's even possible for a 43-year-old Irish woman to look like a 53-year-old American man is a matter of opinion, but you can judge for yourself by clicking here. Although I should warn you that you might get sidetracked by the Mirror story about the "Farmer Who Refused to Eat a Sweet Potato Because it Was Too Sexy for His Plate."

I, meanwhile, will be exploring the possibility of transforming myself into my favorite cinema character, which is Hugh Grant in the movie “Notting Hill.”

Although it may take more than $6,000 to make myself look like him.

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