Ever want to get online to fire off some sort of brilliant observation but fear getting sidetracked by the latest faux controversy or needless debate on Twitter or Facebook?
Me, too, but of course I don't want those ideas to die, so I've taken to recording them as I go just in case one ends up being worthwhile down the road.
Then I thought to myself, "Self, why should these wonderful ideas stay locked on your phone forever? Don't they deserve to be shared with the world?"
"Well, probably not," I thought in replay, "but content is king these days, so let's just see what happens."
And that's how we got to this blog post (thanks for hanging around so far).
Without further ado, consider these, "Things I would have Tweeted if Twitter were still a fun pastime."
It's a new feature on my blog (unless I never do it again)...
- When typing a message, beware how similar “lock” and “lick” are.
- Woody Hayes and Lyndon Johnson look a lot more alike than I ever realized.
- Beer cheese is so good it makes green bean fries enjoyable.
- Remember when ESPN replaced the great Aaron Boone with contemptible phony A-Rod?
- Kohl’s has jorts on sale.
- Once they institute in-game betting for baseball, one of the obvious ones will be Homer Bailey allowing runs the inning after his team scores
- Saw an ad for "s’mores sliders." Finally, s’mores in sandwich form!
- If you’re a home blogger, you should consider cutting the intro on that entry about your best pot roast recipe by about 80%.
- Boss Baby has more plot holes than the Jim Harbaugh Is An Elite College Football Coach narrative
- If you’re a home blogger, you should consider cutting your intro for getting slime out of a 2-year-old’s hair by about 100 percent.
- I’ve heard of people cooking eggs without bacon grease, but I’ve never really grasped the concept.
- The LeBron James has a lot in common J.T. Barrett. Great in a vacuum but controversial in the vortex of idiocy created by the internet. I’m sure there plenty of people who generally understand how good they are, but the loudest observers are the ones who overrate then and those who underrate them. Their debates, based mostly on false narratives, drown out everything else.
- The wise ignore both extremes but that can be easier said than done, especially when you actually work in the field. I think I’m getting better though…
- Speaking of legacies, I think it’s safe to say we’ll never have another Frank Deford, who wrote this in a story for Sports Illustrated about whether or not gaming was bad for society.
- (Drive-ins were like movie theaters except they were outside and you watched them from your car unless you were making out instead. Or so I’ve heard.)
And that's it for now.
Wasn’t by design, but I can’t think of a better way to wrap this little thing than with the most random observation from the best sportswriter who ever lived.
See you next time… if there is a next time.