Book Nook: Some hilarious hitman hijinx in the Ohio River valley

Yocum traces Cipriani’s roots, he grew up dirt poor in a slum known as the Spaghetto in Steubenville, along the Ohio River, adjacent to the Wheeling-Pittsburgh Steel plant. His dad was Italian, his mother, Ukrainian. The story is told from the perspective of an aging hitman in 2019 reflecting back upon his murderous career.

Starting in 1967 we see young Angelo’s ascension from this hardscrabble background. Yocum takes us through flashbacks until timelines converge in 2019. Cipriani worked for three generations of crime bosses; Alphonse “Iceman Al” Fortunato, then Al’s son Big Tommy, then eventually, the grandson, Little Tommy.

The Fortunatos ran brothels but their most lucrative business was gambling, especially sports gambling. They competed with other regional crime syndicates, on occasion they would war over territories. As time passes their business changes. Big Tommy had ethics for a hoodlum, his organization did not sell illegal drugs.

Following the death of Big Tommy his son Little Tommy began to move large volumes of heroin and fentanyl-instead of concealing his illicit millions offshore as had been past practice, he stashes cash in his house. By this time our narrator Angelo Cipriani is aghast at what is happening.

He’s still associated with the Fortunatos but he’s mostly unemployed. Now in his late sixties, Little Tommy rarely calls on him to kill anybody. Now the FBI is sniffing around, they hope Angelo will spill his guts about the Fortunatos. Besides Angelo there’s only one other old time crime associate left standing, his name is Nickels and he’s living in a nursing home.

I’ll leave it to readers to savor this wonderful story. Yocum writes with good humor-this reviewer was thoroughly entertained. As Angelo and his hitman partner Carlo ply their lethal trade we study the fine points of assassinations. Carlo has exacting standards, for instance, he never shoots them in the face so the victim’s families can have an open casket at their funerals.

The last part of the book is one of the funniest and most ingenious things I have read in a long time. I could not stop laughing at the interplay between Angelo and his buddy Nickels who has gotten sprung from the nursing home. Yocum is definitely on to something-I really hope we’ll be seeing more from Angelo. This would make a great movie.