How to Go:
What: Book signing with “The Minimalists,”Josh Millburn and Ryan Nicodemus
When: 6 p.m., Sunday, May 4
Where: Dayton Visual Arts Centre , 118 North Jefferson St., Dayton
Admission: Free
For information: TheMinimalists.com
A dramatic life transformation can be triggered in all sorts of ways: by an upsetting medical diagnosis, the death of a family member, the loss of a job.
For author Cheryl Strayed, whose journey was chronicled in her memoir, “Wild,” the change came after her mother’s death and took the form of a grueling hike on the Pacific Crest Trail. Strayed’s book was selected as this year’s Big Read by the Dayton Metro Library.
For Josh Millburn and Ryan Nicodemus, who met when they were students at Berry Middle School in Lebanon, drastic life changes were triggered by a stressful and materialistic lifestyle that wasn’t nearly as satisfying as the two had anticipated.
At age 30 — after living cushy, corporate existences — the best friends determined to chuck it all and opt for simplicity.
Their dramatic decision to change their own lives is now inspiring millions of others throughout the country to rethink their own. The pair have become known as “The Minimalists” and will be in town for a talk and book signing on Sunday, May 4, at the Dayton Visual Arts Center.
The two have been featured on CBS, BBC, and NPR, and their stories have also been told in USA Today, Forbes, the Wall Street Journal, Boston Globe, Chicago Tribune, and the Toronto Star.
Their book, “Everything That Remains,” traces their fascinating journey.
In the beginning
“We both came from dysfunctional homes and we both grew up on food stamps,” says Nicodemus, who vividly remembers sitting at the lunch table with Millburn during their senior year at Lebanon High School and theorizing that if they could each earn $50,000 a year, they could achieve happiness.
But $50,000, it turned out, didn’t bring either of them joy.
“We got sales jobs shortly after high school and worked in Cincinnati for a major corporation,” Nicodemus explains. “We started at the bottom and quickly began earning $50,000 but we didn’t feel rich. We thought we needed to adjust for inflation, so then we set a goal of $60,000.”
But the higher they climbed on the corporate ladder, he says, the more they wanted.
“Looking back, it was security we were really looking for,” Nicodemus says now. “Because of the way we’d grown up, we assumed that money and material possessions equalled security and happiness.”
But he says he soon discovered that a large condo in Centerville — along with upscale furniture, fancy cars and exotic vacations — simply didn’t satisfy.
“I looked successful, everyone said I was successful, but even though I earned a lot of money I had heaps of debt and was spending money faster than I could earn it,” Nicodemus says. “Chasing the American dream cost me more than money — I was filled with stress and I’d gotten to the point that I didn’t know what was important anymore. There was a gaping void in my life and I was trying to fill it with stuff.”
In those days, he says, he never thought about the kinds of things that were truly important in life — relationships, health, contributing to others.
Making changes
It was about that time that he began to notice a significant change in his friend, Josh.
“I noticed he was happier,” says Nicodemus. “I took him to lunch at Subway in Middletown and asked him why the hell he was so happy lately.”
The answer? Millburn had been studying and trying out the concept of minimalism — removing clutter from his life to make room for what was really important.
“It’s about asking yourself who you really want to be as a person,” Millburn explained, adding that he hadn’t really questioned his life until that time. He realized his “stuff” was getting in his way.
When Nicodemus decided to give minimalism a try as well, friends came up with the idea of a packing party.
“I packed everything up in my condo — towels, TVs, electronics — and pretended I was moving,” says Nicodemus. “The idea was to unpack my belongings only when I actually needed them.”
The first night, he says, he took out sheets, clothing for work, and a toothbrush.
“It was a good way to find out which items I really needed, ” he says, “and I soon realized that 80 percent of the stuff stayed in the boxes. I couldn’t even remember what was in most of them.”
In the end, he donated or sold most of those belongings.
“Our advice is to love people and use things,” Nicodemus says now. “The opposite never works and won’t lead to a meaningful life.”
A simpler life
The friends, who moved to Montana in 2012, say they have never felt more secure in their lives. They write, lecture and travel the country with the message of minimalism.
Their clothing has become a simple uniform — jeans and a shirt.
“We have no condo, no car payments,” says Nicodemus, who says that doing what you love doesn’t mean you have to be poor. They rent a house in Montana, drive an old used car, buy things only when they’re needed.
“It’s about taking time for yourself and doing something you’re passionate about,” Nicodemus says. ” For me, the best way to grow is to contribute to others.”
Millburn has found he is passionate about writing; Nicodemus enjoys mentoring and coaching others. Both volunteer, and have served at Dayton’s House of Bread when they’re back in town.
“When I started to blog and document our journey, it made me feel that I was adding value to other people’s lives,” Millburn explains. “I always suggest people try to understand their values and beliefs, then step back and evaluate where they are putting their focus. It’s important to see if your actions and focus align with those values and beliefs.”
The bottom line, according to The Minimalists: Get rid of clutter — whether it’s emotional, physical or spiritual. Boil your life down to what’s truly essential and what gives you joy.
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