After all, it was yoga class. And our instructor repeatedly makes comments like: Do not force your movements. Let your body flow into the movement naturally.
Not exactly aggressive.
Besides, I thought, how does one relax aggressively? It seemed a little contradictory.
Still, I was ready to give it a try because recently my attempts at relaxation have been of a more passive-aggressive nature: I know I want to relax, my body sends my mind little twitchy clues that I need to relax, and my mind responds with, ahhh, yes, relaxing, that would be good, except, first, wait, what about that big project? What about that loved one we’re so concerned over?
So, yes, I was ready and willing to throw over passive-aggressive relaxation for some nifty aggressive relaxation techniques.
As instructed, I positioned myself comfortably on my yoga mat and waited to hear the instructor share her secret techniques for ordering oneself to relax.
I envisioned mentally barking: “Shoul-ders! Release tension now! Fore-head ... stop clenching now! Dang it neck, how many times do I have to roll you to get the kinks out? Relax! Relax! Relax!”
Finally, everyone in the class was positioned comfortably on their yoga mats and ready for some aggressive relaxation!
Except our instructor said, in her usual, calm, soothing, entrancing voice: “First, release the forehead. Let go ...”
What was this? Certainly not aggressive!
And then it hit me: our instructor had actually said, “Today we will work on progressive relaxation.”
Progressive ... not aggressive.
Oh.
I could think of only two reasons I heard “aggressive” instead of “progressive.”
One: My hearing is going.
Two: Subconsciously, I edited the word because, truth be told, I would like to learn aggressive relaxation!
I’m going with explanation No. 2.
Think about it: Aggressive relaxation would be such a great tool — a way to relax, immediately, on demand, as needed. Reaping all the health benefits, but getting it over fast, then getting back to work, taking care of this, checking off that.
And why can’t we have aggressive relaxation? A relaxation technique that fits our fast-paced world? After all, we have fast food, speed dial, Miracle-Gro for plants, fast-forward for TV shows and movie DVDs, 10-items-or-less checkout lanes, 0-to-50-in-seconds cars, CliffsNotes for books, feel-better-quick pain killers. I’ve even heard of drive-through churches.
So why not aggressive relaxation?
While I mentally whined, our instructor said: “Now, release those shoulders gently to the floor ... ”
“We’re only on the shoulders?” I thought. See, this is why we need aggressive relaxation. With a technique like that, we’d be wrapping up the toes and hopping up to do a few quick downward dog stretches.
That’s when I realized ... my shoulders were cupped up off the floor. I was practically levitating. And the more I was barking at myself to hurry up, get those shoulders down, relax, doggone it, relax, the more tense I was becoming.
Turns out relaxing can’t be hurried. Probably most things we hurry through, we really shouldn’t. We should just find the right pace, the proper pace, for whatever we’re doing.
Enjoy.
Breathe.
Focus.
Connect.
And ...
Relax.
It’s going to take me awhile — OK, the rest of my life, to truly get that.
But that’s OK.
I’m progressing.
Sharon Short’s column runs Monday in Life. Send e-mail to sharonshort@sharonshort.com.
About the Author