Funny stories from the front lines of mommyhood, three vignettes from a household that’s constantly in motion:
Just say no
We’re all milling about the kitchen during that “sweet spot” of the day — 4:30 p.m. — after youngest’s nap, older two kids unwinding from school and looking for a snack, dad starting dinner :), just before mom’s mad rush to get to work at 6ish p.m. We all have a moment to take a breath and inquire about each other’s day.
Cell phone buzzes in the pocket of 13-year-old’s gym shorts, announcing incoming text. He checks it and sprints for the door, saying he’s headed to the park.
About 30 minutes later, he strolls back into the kitchen. I reach UP (!) to give him a hug and ask him what was so urgent at the park.
He says that the girl he likes was there.
I ask, “Have you kissed her?”
He laughs, looks away, and says no.
Still holding onto him like a mother bear playfully wrestling with her cub, I ask if he’s kissed anyone yet.
He laughs again. “No.”
Mom: “Would you tell me if you had?”
Son: (more laughing) “No!”
“Twilight” has entered our house.
My 10-year-old daughter, an avid reader — to put it mildly — finally borrowed the popular book from a friend and finished it the very next night!
I said to her, “You basically just read whenever your eyes are open, don’t you?”
Daughter: “I read whenever I’m not supposed to be doing something else.”
She paused, then added: “And sometimes I read when I am supposed to be doing something else.”
Comedic timing, just like her mom.
Spilling the beans
There’s no getting around it: Working moms miss things. I’m luckier than some because I’m home during the day with the kids, but I do miss the occasional field hockey game or teacher conference while I’m on the late shift.
Case in point: I couldn’t make it to the spring choral concert that my 13-year-old son was performing in (chorus is a class that he wouldn’t have chosen by his own volition, but it beats music appreciation homework).
It’s 7:28 p.m., and I’m knee-deep into editing a pile of stories for the next day’s newspapers.
My phone buzzes.
Text from Hubby: “r’s group sang good ... d didn’t make it to the potty on time and pooped in his pants. all in all a fun time!”
New package of Batman underwear, size 4T: $4.99.
Unlimited text messaging: Priceless.
To read more of Lucy Baker’s blogs, visit DaytonDaily News.com/go/mommy, or share your own funny parenting moments at 937Moms.com.