It’s almost Super Bowl Sunday, and the only things I’m sure of is that the melted Velveeta will taste great and that my son Jake will “dab” as soon as he sees Cam Newton on TV. Then I’ll dab him right out of the room.
The Panthers are bigger favorites to break the Broncos than Donald Trump is to take New Hampshire. How will Peyton Manning respond playing the role of Ted Cruz? I’m assuming that the Panthers defense won’t be distracted by a recitation of the U.S. Constitution, so Manning will have to be on top of his game. Whatever game he has left.
I’m not talking about winning, either. I just hope Manning is good enough to avoid another blowout like the one we had to sit through two years ago when smug Pete Carroll and the Seahawks steamrolled the poor Broncos.
Picking this game is simple: Manning is past his prime and Newton is right in the middle of his. Dab away, Cam. Carolina 31, Denver 13.
Here’s why I don’t go to Super Bowl parties (so don’t ask). An official-sounding poll released last week found that 39 percent of Americans think of the Super Bowl as an entertainment spectacle, and 46 percent consider it a sporting event. As Vince Lombardi famously said on an NFL Films production, “What the hell’s going on out here?”
So go ahead, attend a party. Good luck watching the game or listening to Jim Nantz and Phil Simms. But I guarantee you’ll be able to hear a pin drop during the commercials and the lame halftime show. BTW, that same poll says 84 percent of “football fans” say they prefer seeing the commercials for the first time during the game.
Ohio State’s incoming class of football recruits is highly rated nationally, because Urban Meyer is really good. The class has big names such as Nick Bosa, and even has a Michael Jordan (a 6-foot-7 lineman, so he probably can dunk). But I’m really intrigued by a linebacker from Chicago. Tuf Borland. With a name like that, how can he not be an All-American?
Trending up: Harry Statham, Thomas Davis, Lady Gaga. Statham, 78, is the men’s basketball coach at McKendree University. He has 1,088 victories in 50 seasons drawing up plays and is tied with Pat Summitt for most wins by a coach at a four-year college. I read about Statham last week and discovered that he brings a sack lunch to work and uses a flip phone. Love it.
Trending down: Tony Stewart, Louisville, Toyota Scions. Smoke probably is lucky to be alive after wrecking an all-terrain vehicle. Instead, NASCAR’s bad boy suffered a fractured vertebra. As a result, he’ll miss the start of his final season driving in NASCAR. So much for a breakthrough at Daytona; Stewart is 0-17 in stock-car racing’s showcase event.
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