10 ways to help mark graduation as a rite of passage

This advice for a memorable graduation will help parents and grads.

Everyone knows graduation is a big day for transition. But after the confetti’s cleared, the folding chairs are stacked away and the last mylar balloons have drifted to the floor, what will help the new graduates find their way in the wide-open world?

Here are 10 ideas that draw on the ceremonies that for thousands of years have helped young people navigate their emerging roles of responsibility — and helped their communities work with them to achieve success.

1. Ask the graduate to identify and invite three to 12 loved ones — friends, elders and community leaders — to a graduation gathering or a farewell gathering for those leaving home in the coming months.

2. Set up the space as you would any celebratory gathering, and include an area for focused listening and sharing. An area for special objects such as a photos or spiritual symbols is a boon.

3. Invite everyone to gather around the grad- uate.

4. Go around the group, honoring memories of the graduate and having him or her do the same in turn.

5. Invite the guests to share some of what they’ve learned and accomplished in life, what helped them on their path, and what their life goals are. You may want to set a time limit for this, encouraging people to save longer conversations for one-on-one connections later.

6. Ask the graduate to share their own path of learning and life goals.

7. Offer guests the chance to pledge support for the graduate in the months and years to come. For instance, helping with moves, sharing business contacts, going over career plans.

8. Talk about what options are available when things go astray. Who can the graduate call for help in an emergency? In an emotional crisis? When they feel lost about which path to take? What kind of help will their supporters pledge?

9. Celebrate the graduate’s meaning and new role. Have guests share specific of examples of why the graduate is important to them and the larger community.

10. Encourage deeper connection in the coming months and brainstorm ways people can stay in touch.

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