But then, between you and me, I smiled. Yes, smiled.
I know Lisa really, really wanted this job.
And, I know it’s not the job for her.
How can I know that? Simply, because she didn’t get it.
Over many years of countless disappointments and perceived setbacks I’ve come to one of my basic life philosophies: You can’t mess up the right one and you can’t make the wrong one work.
It’s taken a lot of bumps and bruises to get here. There was the house I was sure was mine.
The jobs I wanted so desperately.
The great loves who broke my heart when they didn’t choose me.
Each disappointment was devastating at the time. And without fail, each one made space for something better to show up in my life. Better house, better job, and, without question — much better man!
Maybe that’s why I find myself pushing not quite as hard these days for something I think I want.
If it’s meant to be and it’s best then bring it on.
If not, sure will be fun to see what better thing is in store.
It hasn’t always been this easy to let go.
Through many heartaches there have been the incredible friends who have believed when I wasn’t ready to yet.
I remember my friend, Gina telling me that she understood I couldn’t believe that a better guy was on the way that night it felt like my heart was shattered in a thousand pieces. “I will hold that space and believe so you don’t have to,” she told me.
Looking back, I think it’s one of the best and most useful gifts I’ve ever received.
During this season of gift giving, might I suggest the best thing you can give, just might be a big old serving of hope.
Go tell your friend who’s grieving her beloved dog that an incredible creature is going to need a place in her heart one day.
Promise your sister who’s so sad this holiday season, that better holidays are on the way.
And just like I will go do for Lisa — assure that job seeker, that though the search is challenging, there is some lucky employer about to hit the jackpot and get her skills.
The most important part of the gift is assuring your loved one they don’t have to buy in to your belief.
You don’t buy a gift from someone. You simply receive.
Together you can call out those near misses for what they truly are — the wrong one.
When the right one does happen, get ready for the biggest “Thank You” note of your life.
Daryn Kagan is the creator of DarynKagan.com. She is the author of “What’s Possible! 50 True Stories of People Who Dared To Dream They Could Make a Difference.”
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